how to stop watching porn

How to Stop Watching Porn on Your Computer

Learning You Have a ProblemTaking Steps to QuitKeeping Consistent

Edited by Juelle Bembry, Wyvernbait, Chris Hadley, Mr handsome and 123 others

If you're looking for ways to stop watching porn on your computer, you may be struggling with a porn addiction that is harming your physical and mental health, as well as eating up your time. If you want to learn how to enjoy life and stop obsessing over porn, read on for some tips in recovering.

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Part 1 of 3: Learning You Have a Problem

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   Admit that you spend too much time watching porn. Before you can stop watching porn on your computer, you have to be able to admit that this activity is taking up too many of your waking hours and having a negative effect on your emotional and physical well-being.^[1]
   • Only you can know how much is too much, because there's no objective number of hours or times in a week that signals "Addiction." Learning to recognize the warnings signs and using your own judgment is important.
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   Recognize that you can't stop. It may be nearly impossible for the average person to stop watching porn right in the middle of a steamy scene, but if you wake up in the morning determined not to watch porn and absolutely can't go a day, or even a few hours, without watching porn, then you may be addicted. Wanting to stop and not being able to stop is a problem.
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   Pay attention to your planning. If you find yourself thinking about porn whenever you're in class, during work, or even when you're hanging out with friends, and planning when to watch it, the situation is serious. It's okay to occasionally think of porn, but if you feel like you're always thinking about it when you're not near a computer, then you have a problem.
   • If you look at porn every single time you're on your personal computer, or if you have an urge to look at porn when you're on a public computer at a library, or on a friend's computer, then you have associated computers with porn. This means you'll need to learn to distinguish the two as you learn to heal.
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   Evaluate your relationship. Are your personal relationships suffering as a result of your relationship with porn? If you have trouble in the bedroom because you can only get aroused when you're watching porn, or if you'd rather be watching porn than hanging out with your latest crush, then you have a situation on your hands.
   • Remember that your porn addiction can be a sign of larger problems in your life, such as sex addiction or depression.
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   Write down all the reasons why you want to quit. Instead of just trying to quit watching porn because you think it's embarrassing or socially unacceptable, you should dig deeper to find the reasons that watching porn has had an adverse effect on your life, and think about how stopping your activity can help improve your situation. Here are some great reasons to stop watching porn:
   • Because you want to return to having healthy, loving relationships with your friends, significant others, and family.
   • Because you want to be able to live in the moment instead of in front of your computer screen.
   • Because you don't want to be a slave to your addictions.
   • Because you're losing sleep, forgetting to eat, and feeling sick because of your problem.
   • Because you feel that you've lost your self-respect, your dignity, and your control over your own life.

Part 2 of 3: Taking Steps to Quit

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   Make it difficult to watch porn. Though many people spend most of their days in front of a computer, there are ways to make it harder for yourself to access porn. Once you're only watching it two or three times a day, put up a porn blocker on your computer, like K9 web protection, which blocks porn. That way, you'll have to go through a longer process to turn it off. This may make you less motivated to watch porn.
   • Avoid surfing the Internet as much as possible and use the computer in the presence of others. Avoid closed spaces and time alone on the computer.
   • If you can, turn off your wireless Internet unless you really need it. Create a somewhat elaborate ritual to make it difficult for you to turn your Internet back on, like a long and complicated wireless password, or make yourself do the dishes every time you want to turn on your Internet.
   • Porn addictions develop partly because porn is so easy to access---if you make it harder for yourself to watch it, you may not want to do it as often.
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   Take it day by day. If watching porn is taking up a large portion of your day, then it's likely that it'll be nearly impossible to stop watching it completely. Instead of quitting cold turkey, create a plan to slowly curb your addiction. Here's how:
   • First, work on limiting the amount of time you spend watching porn by masturbating quickly. Turn it on, turn yourself on, and turn it off.
   • Next, limit the amount of times you watch porn a day. If you watch it five times a day, try to get to no more than once a day by the end of the week. But be careful not to turn this into another kind of obsession.
   • Reward yourself for good behavior. If you go a day without watching porn, eat your favorite dessert or give yourself a small gift, like the pair of shoes you've had your eye on.
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   Stay busy. Your porn addiction may have begun because you were lonely, bored, and couldn't think of anything better to do. Now it's time to take your life into your own hands by creating a meaningful routine that will minimize the amount of time you have to watch porn. Here's how:
   • Exercise. Pick up a new love for jogging, hiking, or team sports. Doing something physical will not only keep you away from the computer, but you'll feel better about yourself in the process.
   • Develop hobbies that keep you away from the computer. Paint outdoors, take up photography, or spend time reading in a park. Do whatever you can to make your life away from the computer meaningful.^[2]
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   Maintain meaningful relationships. Spending time with close friends or a significant other will give you more confidence, and will keep you away from that computer screen. Getting to know and love someone on an intimate level may make porn seem less alluring.
   • Create a schedule for yourself. Keep yourself occupied by trying to fill as many hours of your day as possible. Make the schedule as soon as you wake up, so you know that there will be no time in your day for porn.

Part 3 of 3: Keeping Consistent

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   Set your limits. When you've started cutting back, be very careful to avoid backsliding into your addiction again. If you've got it down to once a day, don't over-celebrate. Decide what your ultimate goal is. Do you want to eliminate watching porn entirely?
   • Once you've started changing your relationship to it, set the ideal ground rules for your new life. Write them down. Consider sharing them with a close and understanding friend to help keep yourself accountable.^[3]
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   Recognize that masturbation is normal. You're most likely watching porn as a means to masturbate, and may be feeling ashamed about pleasuring yourself. However, masturbating is perfectly natural, while watching porn is an addiction that can be cured.
   • Don't be ashamed of masturbating. If you're an adolescent and are exploring the world of masturbation for the first time, you will be exceptionally curious about pleasuring yourself--and that's okay. Masturbating once or twice a day is a healthy way to relieve tension and to be in touch with your body.
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   Talk to a close friend about it. Even if your friend isn't able to help you find a new game plan, just having someone to talk to can make you feel less alone.
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   Know when to get help. If you've tried to stop watching porn on your own and have not been able to do it, you may need to seek outside help. Though you may be embarrassed to discuss the situation with another person, in the long run, you won't regret reaching out. Here are some places to turn to:
   • Find help on the Internet^[4]. Research the topic and see what other people who suffer from similar problems recommend. But if spending time on the Internet is triggering your porn watching, then minimize your online time, or do it with a friend.
   • Join a 12-step program. Find support through programs in your area that can help you fight your problem. You'll gain invaluable knowledge and will feel comforted by the fact that there are others with your problem.
   • Know that many recovery programs are religious in nature. It can be a powerful way to change the trajectory of your life, but do your research so you know what you're getting into.
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